...inevitable...

When you are feeling happy and then worrying that it's not going to last, is like eating and then worrying that you are going to do a shit! lol...

On Marriage

I remember a few weeks ago, in my office, my colleague was talking about dating and marriage, and I said "I don't care about getting married", and "it means nothing to me, for me, as long as we are together, as long as there is love"...that's how I feel about it, for me...I'm fine with, and respect, other people wanting to get married, that means something to them, and is "right" for them...but I don't feel like I need it, and I don't...I'd love to meet someone, though, and have a close, loving, deep (etc) relationship with him...

If someone doesn't want to get married, it doesn't necessarily mean that they lack commitment and/or that they do not love their partner, and/or that they cannot be trusted...a couple can have a relationship where they stay together for many years, and/or for the rest of their lives, without being married (and I have known a few of these couples...).

Sometimes it is, actually, because one of the partners does not want to get married to their current partner, and/or who said that they did not believe in marriage, and then they break up, and he/she marries the next partner! And it was because they changed their mind when they met the "right one"...it's not always to do with deceit...

It can present a large hurdle in a relationship, when one partner does not want to get married, and the other partner really wants to, and/or needs to...I am reminded of the film, "He Is Just Not That Into You", (which I really like and have seen a few times!), when Jennifer Anniston's character doubted the love of her partner because he did not believe in marriage...even though he loved her very much...

Breaking up a relationship may not be a failure

I've just read a bit of an article ("accidental" find) on how J-Lo and Halle Berry "can't keep a man", and how they "failed" to do so...now I know that people make "mistakes", but to me, I do not see the couples (married or not) breaking up their relationship, to be a "failure", as if one or both of them "failed" just by seperating...

Perhaps, sometimes, the main reason why people break up, is because it just wasn't "meant to be" anymore...because they had grown in different directions...because they became (or discovered that they were) incompatible, not complimenting one another...

Maybe, some people are not "meant to be together" forever...and it does not mean that they have "failed" if they break up...sure, it could sometimes, partly, be to do with some things that they need to grow and/or heal in themselves...but...we are forever growing and healing...

Maybe...some people are "meant" to have more than one or several different partners throughout their life, and that suits them as a person and their life path...and maybe someone is only meant to be with one person for the rest of their lives, for the same reasons, and maybe some people are "not meant" to be with anyone throughout this life, for the same reasons...

I am reminded, of how some older married couples, stay together with their partner (who has cheated on them, and/or has abused them, or just that they are not enjoying the relationship anymore...) mainly because they feel like they would be a "failure" if they got a divorce...

To me, I do not see people getting a divorce, as "wrong" or as a failure...if it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be...